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Cleaning between the camel's toes:
| Rank | Moved | Squad | Comments | Top Overall Pilot |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0 | United | Lost to Balls in a tense match. Dantos, Demerol, and AgentSteel came back 3v4 to win it. Spitfire's tonsils are still raw after slicing it up on his toenails while giving his foot some deep throat action. In spite of the loss, United played well enough that I was awarded mcp for my spectacular 0-2. | esidebob 12-5 |
| #2 | 0 | Dissent | Def. #8 Spell. What a great match. Lotsa subbing, went down to the wire, and not a single slot died out in spite of the high scores. Revue is not to be denied this season. | Revue 10-3 |
| #3 | +1 | Money | Def #3 Bad. This team is out for vengeance after their loss last week. I think they've regained their focus and should continue to quietly stomp asses the rest of the season. | Leathal 8-3 |
| #4 | -1 | Bad | Bad appeared to field their best lineup but the Leathel/Terro combo tapped Imp out without too much fight. Bad will have to steamroll their next 5 matches to live up to their self-proclaimed hype. | Bronx 7-2 |
| #5 | 0 | In Flames | Def. #12 NW in yet another kickass match this week. After NW led the 1st 30 minutes the lead changed hands several times before IF scrambled in the last 7 minutes to KO the dangerous Covert Agent for the win. | Ra 9-7 |
| #6 | 0 | Creation | Creation upset by Secret. I suspect overconfidence. Don't Talk to Me died twice in a row to open the game forcing them back on their heals the entire match. In spite of their strong preseason showing, Creation is showing inconsistentency. | i hate the wind 4-0 |
| #7 | 0 | Mutiny | Def #15 Llamasery 12-1 in the largest margin of victory of the season. Mutiny should technically move up one rank, but this match had little impact and Creation's loss seems like a fluke. Next week will break the tie. | Timebomb 4-0 |
| #8 | 0 | Spell | Almost pulled off the upset of the week against the powerhouse Dissent. | Cash 5-0 |
| #9 | +1 | Dragonwings | Def. #13 Friendly Fire. FF put up some fight but could not overcome the experience DW brings to the table. | Xorbid 6-1 |
| #10 | +1 | Fighting Foodons | Def. #9 Emblem in an extremely close game. Fluff turned on the afterburners w/ 5 mins left KO'ing the 1st slot and getting 4 kills in a row. | WTF RAISED X COST! 12-5 |
| #11 | -2 | Emblem | In spite of another loss, Numpf and Target are leading their team well on the field. Was tied w/ 5 minutes left when fluff stole the game from them. | Targetlock 8-7 |
| #12 | 0 | Nightwatch | Almost! Tough loss this week, but the come-from-behind kings may be picking up steam for their playoff run, it's not too late! | Morpheus 3-1 |
| #13 | +1 | Secret | Def. #6 Creation in the upset of the week. Secret fielded a rare gem: their best lineup. I suspect this event is a fluke. Time will tell. | Pempu 9-4 |
| #14 | -1 | Friendly Fire | FF couldn't keep their momentum. They will need to find a stable starting four before they can keep up this season. | twista 5-1 |
| #15 | 0 | Llamasery | Every league needs a squad that can help teams rebound after tough losses (cough, Starseed, cough). Llamas are Budweiser's Real American Heros, we salute you friendly-but-resilient-mostly-losing-team-this-season. You have to respect teams that keep showing up against difficult odds. | Razar 3-5 |
| #? | + | BALLISTICS | Last undefeated team in league. | Demerol 10-2 |
Without further adieu:
| Rank | Moved | Squad | Comments | Top Overall Pilot |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 0 | United | Def. #2 Dissent. Clash of the pseudo pro teams this week. The one w/ the most pro players wins! I can't quite put my finger on the reason why, but this many pro-level players on single teams makes me vaguely ill. Cheers to teams like Symph and BD that aren't afraid to play at the highest level. eside still cashing in. | esidebob 12-1 |
| #2 | 0 | Dissent | Lost to the only squad w/ more ringers, no surprise. On a positive note, at least the ringers on these teams have the nuts not to alias. | Captor 3-0 |
| #3 | +1 | Bad | Def. #14 Llamasery. I guess I shouldn't be so harsh on Diss and United...at least half the squads in IML have more than one solid ex-pro pilot/starter on their rosters. I'm sure this is a healthy indicator of Pro League. | fresh 4-1 |
| #4 | -1 | Money | Upset of the week. Either this will be the kick in the pants Money needs to focus on this league or it will be final push that makes them realize they don't really care about winning. | Leathal 4-2 |
| #5 | +4 | In Flames | Def. #3 Money in a close match--tied at 5-5 33 minutes deep. Terro KO'ed a minute later to seal the victory. | Ra 4-3 |
| #6 | +1 | Creation | Def. #8 NW with a dominance. Don't Talk To Me is ______? | Don't Talk To Me 5-2 |
| #7 | -1 | Mutiny | Lost to Ballistics in a match that could have gone either way. | Pushead 2-5 |
| #8 | -3 | Spell | Another big upset here. Spell underestimated Emblem and got burned. | Cash 5-0 |
| #9 | +2 | Emblem | Def. #5 Spell in a a really fun match to watch with the lead changing hands throughout. Numpf and Target starting to lead their team well on the field. | Targetlock 4-4 |
| #10 | +2 | Dragonwings | Def. #13 Secret with little difficulty. Xorbid is 10-1 including preseason, who is he? | Xorbid 6-1 |
| #11 | -1 | Fighting Foodons | Took a beating by Friendly. | Fluff! 5-3 |
| #12 | -4 | Nightwatch | NW not showing much fight these days. | Morpheus 3-1 |
| #13 | +2 | Friendly Fire | Def. #10 Foodons with a strong showing, leading the whole match. A much needed win here. | twista 5-0 |
| #14 | -1 | Secret | Sinking fast. | finn 2 TKs |
| #15 | -1 | Llamasery | Same old same old. | Razar 1-2 |
| #? | + | BALLISTICS | AgentSteel is on a tear. 12-3 including preseason. | AgentSteel 7-1 |
Are you prepared for this?
| Rank | Moved | Squad | Comments | Top Pilot |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | +6 | United | Merges w/ a pro team but promises not to field more than 1 or 2 ringers per match. Spanked #10 Emblem riding on eside/masterlord's shoulders. | esidebob |
| #2 | -1 | Dissent | Def. #6 Mutiny with little trouble. | Captor 3-0 |
| #3 | +2 | Money | Def. #2 Creation in a decisive victory | Leathal 4-2 |
| #4 | -1 | Bad | Def. #12 In Flames in a close, cum-from-behind cyber session. | fresh 4-1 |
| #5 | -1 | Spell | Def. #15 Friendly Fire in a prolonged seige. | Cash 5-0 |
| #6 | 0 | Mutiny | Put up a good fight for 20 minutes vs. Dissent. cdb! was surprising 1st KO. | Pushead 0-3 |
| #7 | -5 | Creation | Inglorious loss to Money. Beat down and then swept after a mid-game choke by sixth. | Don't Talk To Me 3-2 |
| #8 | 0 | Nightwatch | Def. #13 Dragonwings in a 1st round Nailbiter. NW gave up a 3-point lead forcing OT before simonsays became the KO of shame. | Morpheus 3-1 |
| #9 | +3 | In Flames | Almost pulled the upset vs a stumbling #3 Bad. A late-game choke by rifle saved Bad some ignonimy. | Ra 4-3 |
| #10 | -1 | Fighting Foodons | Def. #11 Secret after Secret's momentum petered out following a 3-0 start. Three TK's in this match, haha! finn hoarded two of those to set the season record...any challengers!? | Fluff! 5-0 |
| #11 | -1 | Emblem | 1st victim of the newly inflated United machine. Em got rocked early, struggled to stand up, but then got kicked in the nuts to add insult to injury. | numpf 3-3 |
| #12 | +1 | Dragonwings | Frustration here. If the log is right, DW has now lost two OT matches in a row! They also recruited some semi-active pro'ish talent and almost pulled an upset here. | Xorbid 3-0 |
| #13 | -2 | Secret | Recruit more Euros next season! | finn 2 TKs |
| #14 | 0 | Llamasery | Rough start. | |
| #15 | 0 | Friendly Fire | These guys have a couple decent players, just keep coming up empty. | |
| #? | + | BALLISTICS | Demerol 4-0 |
Upset of the week goes to Spell over Money w/ a close second being In Flames over Nightwatch. Next week should tell if preseason weirdness was a fluke. Let's review the results and realign the rankings:
#1 (Diss) defs #? (Balls) - Ball had some lag issues, but even that minor slip was enough for this championship gunning Diss team to pound their point home. Insult to injury after the last minute come-from-behind victory by Diss in the CZL finals yesterday.
#2 (Creat) defs #8 (Rebs) - Slow and steady solid victory over an esidebobless rebs. Creation comes out of preseason with a flawless record. Do not doubt my rankings!
#7 (Mut) defs #13 (DW) - This turned out to be the defensive game of the week going into overtime even after DW had a slot choke out at 4-3.
#5 (Spell) defs #3 (Mon) - Minor upset here w/ Artisan making some key early kills. MoR (Moment of Rant): aliases are fucking retarded in all ways, I'm glad some guy named "Use the LAG Luke!" choked hard. Feel free to post everyone's aliases on the iml board, anyone, please?
#4 (Bad) defs #9 (Foods) - This match lasted 17 mins and 23 seconds longer than it takes semi to masturbate. This one was over in record time w/ match at 6-5 14 mins into it before the fluffster got flattened.
#14 (Secr) defs #10 (Llams) - Secret gets their much needed first victory in a solid route of the humpless dromedaries.
#12 (Emb) defs #11 (Friend) - Emblem gets their first win here as FF gets blanked 0-3 in the preseason. Numpf w/ the record of the week at 8-1!
#15 (IF) defs #6 (NW) - Ok, ok, doubt my rankings. I.F. (are they any good?) starting to get things together. And I fear that NW will fall to a middle-tier team this season.
Rankings: Will add top players when MR is working.
#1 (0) Dissent
#2 (0) Creation
#3 (+1) Bad
#4 (+1) Spell
#5 (-2) Money
#6 (+1) Mutiny
#7 (+1) Rebels
#8 (-2) Nightwatch
#9 (0) Fighting Foodons
#10 (+2) Emblem
#11 (+3) Secret
#12 (+3) In Flames
#13 (0) DragonWings
#14 (-4) Llamasery
#15 (-4) Friendly Fire
#? (-) Ballistics